©deborah owens
The Minnesota Multi Phasic Canine Personality Disorder Test (MMPCPDT)
Selective Factors to Determine Proper Socialization, and Other Breeder Created Ills copyright 2008 Deborah Owens
Please Add Points - no cheating you are not a breeder at a dog show.
Does the dog chase the postal carrier?
Yes 10 Points ( he is obviously a pit bull mix)
No 0 Points
Does the dog hide under the bed during thunderstorms?
Yes 10 Points (he has not been properly desensitized- expose him to the weather channel)
No 0 Points
Does the dog lift his leg?
Yes 10 points (gotcha)
No 0 Points
Does the dog shrink when the vet is approaching with a needle?
Yes 10 Points (obviously unsocialized)
No 0 Points
Does the dog chase cars?
Yes 10 Points if he is a big dog
Yes 100 Points if he is a toy breed, (red alert- not a purebred- breeder credibility in question)
No 0 Points
Does the dog now, or has the dog ever, eaten poop?
Yes 10 Points (the breeder taught him to do this- that is the only way it could happen)
No 5 Points (he did, you just did not see him, again, the breeder taught him to do this)
Does the dog eat grass?
Yes 10 Points- (a hangover from his starvation by the breeder)
No 0 Points
Does the dog bark when you confine him while you are barbecuing chicken?
Yes 10 Points (the breeder thought he was a chicken, and raised him in stacked cages like poultry)
No 0 Points
Does the dog bark at cats?
Yes 10 Points, (he was so vicious the breeder had to raise him in isolation, this proves it)
No 10 Points (he obviously fears the cat and has not been exposed to other animals)
Is the dog pet quality?
Yes 100 Points (only bad breeders contribute to overpopulation with inferior animals)
No 100 Points (He is obviously from an ego-driven show breeder)
Does the dog enjoy the company of curs?
Yes 0 Points
No 100 Points, obviously the product of a snobby hobby breeder
Does the dog vote?
Yes 100 Points, (victim of breeder propaganda)
No 0 Points, good dog, owns himself and his owner
If the score is above zero (0) the breeder must be charged and when sentenced must be executed posthaste in the dog's backyard.
copyright 2008 Deborah Owens
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